The Secret to Happiness

Happiness is a Choice

Happiness is a Choice

Thousands of books have been written on the secret to happiness, but Alexander Chalmers has summed it up in a simple sentence:

The three grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. — Alexander Chalmers

I would like to share the ways that these essentials have worked in my life to provide me with a constant feeling of happiness:

Something to Do

I am a health, safety, and environmental director for a large company. In my job, I must motivate people to work safely and deal with the aftermath when they do not. Although my job is stressful at times, it is also fulfilling. I enjoy meeting new people and giving them words of encouragement. However, I do not allow people to define me by my profession. If I were to lose my job, I would still be happy because I realize that it is only means to an end. It is not who I am. If I never held another job in my life, I’d still have something to do: serve people at my church, work on issues that are important to me such as homelessness, education, and HIV/AIDS, write, and create art. These are the things that make me happy and define me as a person.

Someone to Love

Love is risky and can tear your heart apart. But it can also fulfill the desires of your soul and allow you to experience unbridled joy.

My wife, KayEm, has given me this joy. I never really knew what it meant to love someone until I met her. After nearly 13 years of marriage, she still makes me laugh, gives me strength, and rejuvenates my spirit. I can make it through each day because I know she is at home waiting for me to make everything okay.

She is my queen, my best friend, the one who fills my life with beauty. I thank God for sending her into my life and I plan to love her forever.

Something to Hope For

My children give me hope. Their eyes are my looking glass into the future. There is so much possibility and wonder in their faces; so many things to accomplish. I hope and pray that they will realize their full potential and make a difference in the world. It is my responsibility as their father to equip them and give them the tools for success. My legacy lives on through them.

Stay Strong,

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Join the conversation: Do you have something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for?

About author

Frederick J. Goodall

Frederick J. Goodall is the founder of Mocha Dad - a parenting website focused on fatherhood. He is passionate about parenting and helping men to be great dads, husbands, and role models. You can contact him at or on Twitter at

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